Confused shit

So, there's this guy. I liked him for so long, that I feel like I'm in love with him already. I don't know. I've already given up on the idea of us being together, so I was not really expecting anything. I was planning to just feel all these kilig feelings whenever I'm with him.

But then he gave me some attention. And not just some attention, he was flirting with me. So, I was kind of hoping that he likes me too. But then, he indirectly told me that all these time, he knew that I liked him. He also indirectly told me that he's not interested in me. It kind of made me sad because he kind of gave me false hope. Medyo paasa.

He knows what he's doing. He knows what's happening, but still, he keeps on staying with me. I don't know if I should be touched or worried. Is he doing these because he likes me? Or maybe he just wants someone to flirt with? Well, he got plenty of those, so.. Hmm. Maybe he just wants someone around, to like him? Yea, I could be that person. Because this feeling won't go away any time soon, I can just feel it.

Do you know what's more sad about this? If ever he would actually like me, it would probably be because I like him. Gets mo? If he haven't found out that I liked him, then we would probably be just friends until now. He would never have interest in me.

Or maybe he's not that kind of person? I don't know. He told me that himself anyway. He told me he's confused. He doesn't know if he really likes me or maybe he just missed having a girlfriend.

That's what I like about him. Well, that's what makes me fall in love with him more. He's honest. Brutally honest, yes. But, honest. I'm happy that he tells me these kinds of things. He talks about his feelings freely. He even tells me his perv thoughts :)))) Not a pretty thing to hear, but I'd rather have him say it, than have him keep it all inside. I don't want any huge wave of pervness :)))))

The more I talk to him, the more I fall for him. He's different.

And I can tell all of these things to you. I can trust you with my feelings, I know. You're the kindest guy I've ever liked. =)))

I love you, you stupid ass shit.